Taking our way back
by kateandcastlealways
Summary: AU. Castle disappeared five years ago. Kate was searching for him without giving up the hope, until the day when he was pronounced dead after two years of inefficient searches. Their son became a rock for Kate, a reason to live. But what will happen when Castle suddenly get back? Will Kate be able to understand and forgive him? Set after season 6 finale.


**A/N Hey everyone! So, I don't really have an experience writing i english, but I decided to give this a shot. It's not long, I'm really sorry, but I hope I'll be able to correct that soon. I'm bad with grammar and describing, so please, no hate. If you don't like it and don't have any good suggetions for a new author, please, just pass by.**

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Chapter 1

It's been five years. Five years since her fiancé disappeared. Five years since she found out she's pregnant.

Small boy ran down to her in the middle of the night and jumped into bed, waking Kate up. He was shaking in fear.

"What happened, sweetheart?" she asked wrapping her arms around her son, pulling him closer to her chest, stroking his hair trying to calm him down.

"Mommy, I had an awful nightmare… Those monsters were there" he said crying.

"Hey, everything is okay, buddy. Mommy is here with you…" she said placing a kiss on her son's head. "Everything is okay, Alex, let's just get to sleep."

"I don't want to go back to my room…" Alex said crying even more.

"You shouldn't go anywhere. Come on; lay right here next to me."

"Okay" he said getting under the blanket. Kate turned to him and wrapped her arms around her son.

"Mommy will always protect you." she whispered placing another kiss on Alex's forehead. Listening to the steady breath of her little boy she slowly started drifting away.

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She's looking at her son peacefully sleeping in bed next to her, on the place where Castle used to sleep on. He has Castle's eyes and definitely Castle's character. She watched him grow, becoming smarter day by day. He became the sense of her life, the reminder of what she and Castle had and what they've done together. He was her reason to wake up every day, her reason to hold on the life, her reason not to give up, her reason to try to make the life of her son better, her reason to still be here.

He starts moving and open his eyes. His gorgeous blue eyes. That's funny. The chance that he will have blue eyes was 50%, same as the chance for him to have hazel eyes. Nature worked good on this.

"Good morning, bud." said Kate, smiling to the appearence of her son.

"Morning, mommy." he responded smiling back. He reached to touch Kate's hair. Curls slipped through his fingers and fell back down. He liked playing with her hair.

 _Just like Castle used to._

"Gradpa wanted to meet us today. An then Alexis and Grandma wanted to come over." she said. She haven't seen Martha and Alexis for months. After Castle dissapered and was pronounced dead, she just couldn't find the power in herself to look in the eyes of his daughter, who lost her father, and his mother, who lost her only son. Kate knows how it is not having a parent. It hurts as hell. But she never will be able to imagine what Martha feels. After Alex was born, Kate moved out from the loft and went back to her old apartment. Every day Kate prays to God to let her child be healthy and with her. She feels guilty. It's her fault Castle dissapeared. She couldn't protect him, she haven't find him. Because of her Caste isn't here now.

"So come on, get up, go brush your teeth and I will make something for breakfast" she said getting out of bed and putting her robe on.

She's going to kitchen, put the pan on the stone, turned on the burner, grabbed some eggs, chocolate drops and marshmallows. Smorlettes. Castle's dish, he used to cook almost every morning. She put a teabag into her cup and add some hot water. Now she's drinking only tea. She kind of dealed with it during her pregnancy, and coffee reminded of Castle too much. Plus Kate was never able to make as tasty coffee as Castle made. Once he said to her, that he adds one secret ingridient. But Kate never found out what it was.

She set plates on table and call Alex to eat. After having breakfast they went to park, where Jim already was waiting for them.


End file.
